twenty-two

Happy New Month Loves!

June is one of my favourite months actually, it's my mum's birthday month! So June is here and it's got me all forms of excited.

So this is the time of the year where most people are rounding up final year and getting ready to graduate from university. While every one has their unique experience of finishing university and having the rest of their lives ahead of them. I believe that there are similar feelings that most people can relate to during this particular phase of their lives.

I've realised that during this phase, it is so easy to worry about whether everything's going according to plan. I feel like as human beings, we would love if someone just came and gave us a perfect picture of our lives and told us how our lives would be like from now on and what decisions to take next. But I've learnt that in life, we're not always going to have it all figured out, and that's okay! A lot of the time, we end up getting miserable in that 'waiting' period, waiting till we have answers and waiting till everything makes sense. But it is important to just enjoy the process and accept that sometimes we're not going to have all the answers or have everything figured out and that’s okay.

I remember turning 22, and just thinking wow! I've officially reached that age where I need to have everything figured out and now I need to get every thing right. I had just finished law school at the time. The period when you're done with university (or law school in my case) can be one of the most daunting experiences ever. When you're at school, you have one job, which is to pass your exams, and while at the time, it will seem like the most difficult thing ever; you would go on to face more difficult things in life, and then that would seem easy. 

I remember everyone asking me after law school, so what’s next? And I had no idea. In fact, I was asking myself the same thing lol. I wasn’t sure what area of law I wanted to specialise in at the time, because I have too many interests- which isn’t always a good thing. I also wasn’t sure of what area I wanted to work in. I had all these questions on what to do next. With all these uncertainties, I decided to take a year off. I decided to put off my masters for a year. I felt quite stressed after law school and I also wasn’t sure of what the next step was, so a year off seemed like the best thing to do. It was one of the most daunting decisions I have ever made. I was doing something different; I wasn’t following the status quo. It felt scary but exciting at the same time. A few years ago, one of my favourite characters- Larissa Loughlin from Carrie Diaries said that, ‘the moment where all is lost is the moment where I want to live in, because that is where creativity is born’ and I believe she was right.

This year off has been nothing but a gift, I look back now and it’s one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. It gave me the opportunity to explore my other passions, do things I wouldn’t have had the time to do earlier. I had the opportunity to travel, visit my favourite art galleries, attend spoken word nights, explore museums and visit new places, try out new food, meet new people, and how can I forget? It gave me the opportunity to try something new- start this blog, and all the amazing stories that have come out of it. It made me ‘be still’ and pay attention to so many things. It made me realise what my true passions were- now I have a fair idea of what area of law I want to go into. Most importantly, it helped me realise that it is okay to not have everything all figured out. I learnt this year that there is something more important than knowing where you're going in life, and that is knowing who is with you as you go. And I know that God doesn’t want us worrying about our lives, but He wants us to enjoy it and live it to the fullest. [John 10:10 “I came that you may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (live it to the fullest, till it overflows).” He wants us to live life with the confidence that He is with us and He is guiding us along the right path, and that His goodness and love will continue to follow us all the days of our lives. And rather than allowing the season where you're unsure of what's next to overwhelm you or fill you with fear of the unknown, nothing should really be stealing your peace. Rather, you should allow the promises of God to dispel those fears, and allow the goodness of God to overwhelm you.

I learnt that 22 doesn’t have to be a year of ‘Oh my God, I have to have it all figured out by now’ but it could be another year to just marvel at the wonder of what God is doing in your life, and just enjoy the ride! I use the word ‘wonder’ here intentionally- wonder means to not know and to desire to know. (There’s also this new song called Wonder by Hillsong that I’m so in love with at the moment, and you can watch it here)

What I’m really saying is, enjoy the process. Enjoy being twenty-something, discover new things about yourself, take more risks, do things that surprise you. I know too well that the period when you finish university can be very daunting, there’s actually a name for it online- it’s called post-college cluelessness lol. I came across a blog post sometime last year about it and she couldn’t have said it better. You can access the full blog post here. She said that the reason this period can be very daunting for most people, is that (paraphrasing here)

“...since you were a child, you have followed a clear-cut path right from primary school down to university. A path that has always been straightforward- ‘just pass this level and move on to the next.’ Now all of a sudden, there are no longer levels. You have to make a decision about what the next course of your life is, and that is daunting for most people. However, if you are not sure what your next step is, it is okay and don’t panic. If you feel that you need to take some time off to think and really figure out what your true passions are, then that’s okay. There’s no point rushing into a new degree or a new job if you know deep down that that’s not what you’re passionate about.

What is important during this period is that you are taking steps each day to improve some aspect of your life. As long as you are doing that, then you are on the right track.”

She couldn't have said it any better.

So to you who just turned a year older (or just finished uni), your life is only just beginning! You’re staring at that blank page before you, and the rest is still unwritten! I don’t know about you but to me, that is exciting! 

I have less than three months left before I go to Oxford, so maybe I’m feeling a little nostalgia for this year that’s trying to run away too fast- I don’t know, but that’s okay! (haha see what I did there ;) 

Sending positive energy your way!

Tunrie xx